The group has to contend with hippos, elephants, a cobra, jaguars, a surprisingly dangerous squirrel, and more snakes.
I’m a big-time ophidiophobe, so during the snake scenes I was glad that this movie’s special effects were all unconvincing CGI. There’s also a villain played by Bobby Cannavale, who’s so bland that when Cannavale’s name appeared in the end credits, I wondered where he had been in the movie.
All the inevitable jokes about the displaced animals invading suburbia and becoming Internet sensations would get old real quick.
Also, the movie doesn’t seem to know whether it wants a PG or PG-13 rating (it’s PG-13), so the humor is mostly tame save for a few lowbrow jokes that are supposed to be edgy. “Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle” isn’t an offensively bad movie, just an annoying one.
It’s pretty easy to tell what beats the story is going to hit, and we wait as the movie slogs through each one.
This movie is about a jungle-themed video game that sucks players into its world.
It’s probably better that this film goes in a different direction.
If the group ever wants to get back to the real world, they have to finish the game without getting killed.
That is, if they don’t kill each other first, because they’re still teenagers and they have drama.Seriously, two of them do kill each other, but they all have three lives, so the murders don’t take.The action is what you’d expect from a jungle adventure movie.Easy to see why: The hometown kid turned in one of the best pitching performances ever at Coors Field.The rookie left-hander came within two outs of the first no-hitter by a Rockies pitcher at the hitter-friendly park before surrendering a crisp single to Melky Cabrera as Colorado beat the Chicago White Sox 10-0 on Sunday.After two hours, I was more than ready to say goodbye to the jungle.